best man speeches
Best man speeches are part of every wedding, as the occasion calls for people to extend their kindest wishes to the bride and groom. While most people these days consider wedding speeches as cliche or boring, they are in fact symbolic of the relationships that exist between and among the friends of the newly married couple. For those who are worrying about their best man speech, it is necessary to understand what such obligation entails as well as how to compose and deliver just the right words.
Below is a list of things to consider when writing a best man speech as well as some tips on how to effectively deliver it in front of the bride and groom, and all the guests.
Best Man Speeches Should be Simple and Brief
Best men do have their responsibilities to the groom, among which is to make the speech simple and relatable. While you might know the groom very well, the event does not call for a full on story telling that goes on for hours. Keep in mind that the guests can only listen to speeches for so long before they either doze off or start ignoring you. The maximum time for a great wedding speech is about 8 minutes, but anything between 4 to 7 minutes would be perfect.
Keep the Jokes Clean and Funny
It has become a tradition for wedding speeches to be intelligently cloaked roasts of the groom (and sometimes the bride too). However, the best man should never treat the reception as his own private open mike night at the improv. Telling jokes and funny anecdotes about the groom is one thing, but blatantly sharing his most embarrassing or “dark” secrets would be considered crossing the line.
Always remind yourself that there are family members of the bride and groom who will be at the reception, and some of them (particularly the elderly) might not appreciate your humor.
Offer Your Best Wishes at the End of the Toast
Wedding speeches are all about wishing the couple eternal happiness and love, so it is very important that your last words revolve around such sentiment. You want the bride and groom to know that you have their best interest at heart and that they can always count on your support as far as their marriage is concerned. Weddings are all about merging families together, and as the best man, you become part of a bigger circle.
Tips on Delivering Best Man Speeches
How to Overcome Nervousness
Not everyone enjoys being in the spotlight, let alone stand in front of hundreds of people to speak. Nervousness and jitters are very common among best men, especially those who prefer not to be the center of attention. However, this can easily be overcome with the use of positive thinking and a few calming techniques.
It would not hurt to write down and memorize your speech so that you wont have to worry about forgetting the words in the middle of the toast. Being prepared for a speech would most definitely help calm your nerves and take the edge off. It is also smart to allow yourself a few minutes to breathe and relax before giving the toast so you do not feel or look rattled.
How to Exude Confidence
Body language is very important when it comes to giving any type of speech. In order to look every bit as confident, it is always best to maintain excellent posture and eye contact with the audience (or in this case, the bride and groom). Keep in mind that all eyes and video cameras would be on you for the entirety of the speech, so it wont look good if you are fidgety or tentative.
Make sure your voice is loud enough to be heard by everyone and that the microphone is not covering your face or mouth. Modulation is very important, and so is making the necessary pauses in between sentences. This would not only signify confidence but also affirm the sincerity of the speech.
Best Man Speeches Do’s and Don’ts
Do’s
Use proper grammar in your speech. While you are not being graded, a lot of people will be listening closely to how well you deliver the speech and whether or not you use the right words. This is especially true if the guest list consists of professionals and well educated people. There is never a drawback to being eloquent, especially in special events like weddings.
Address the bride and groom directly. Since it is their special day, it is only proper that you address the couple directly while delivering the speech. This would make them feel just how sincere you are and how much you value the fact that you have been chosen as the best man.
Don’ts
Use foul language. While other men might be able to appreciate green language, it might not sit very well with the ladies. As the best man, you have the responsibility to hold the event sacred and respectable. If you cannot help yourself, save it for the after party when it is just you guys (groomsmen and other male friends).
Make the toast about yourself. A lot of best men make this mistake, mostly because of the fact that they are very close to the groom. In most cases, sharing anecdotes about adventures you and the groom have embarked on can inadvertently become all about you. Makes sure that you keep the speech all about the groom, his bride, and their love for each other.
Do not make a drunken toast. Weddings, while fun occasions, are supposed to be dignified events attended by respectable people. As the best man, it is highly inappropriate to give a drunken toast as it may upset the bride as well as the other guests. If you wish to enjoy the free flowing liquor, make sure you do so after the best man speech.
Best man speeches are not always perfect, but they need to be heartfelt and sincere. While there are many ways of preparing for the most incredible toast, it is your deepest and sincerest sentiments that matter greatly. The most incredible best man speeches are those made by honorable men who want nothing more than the happiness of his dear friend and his bride.
